"There comes a certain point in life when you have to stop blaming other people for how you feel or the misfortunes in your life. You can't go through life obsessing about what might have been." - Hugh Jackman

Friday, October 14, 2011

Chapter 3 - Best Of Friends


It’s been two months now that Jeremy tries and tries and dies trying to be cool and be charming with Amanda, and he suck at it. He calls me his best friend, he’s sort of my best friend too because he spends more time here in my place and talks about Amanda and Amanda and Amanda rather than studying at home which I got used to. I felt weird when he came one afternoon and he just asks me to help with our lessons on Anatomy.

I went outside the bathroom after a late night shower and lay on my bed after I put on my clothes on. It’s been a long week and thank God it’s Sunday tomorrow and I don’t have homework or things to do. I closed my eyes and was ready to sleep when my phone rang. What the hell? I look at the digital clock beside my bed, it says it’s already 12:45 a.m. Who would call me at this time of the night?

I picked my phone and looked at the screen, it was Jeremy. I opened the drawer beside my bed and put my phone inside it and I pretend that I didn’t hear it and went back to sleep.

*     *     *

Amanda and I went to the church together the next morning. We both laughed when we saw each other, I was wearing an orange turtle neck and white jacket while she wears a white dress and orange cardigan.  It felt like we’re dating until Peter comes along. He laughed at us and said he thought we’re going to perform inside. Jerk, I thought to myself.

The three of us sat on the pews of the church, Amanda sitting between me and Peter. Peter was a talkative person, he talks and makes fun of the pastor and people inside the church and Amanda says he’s being rude and I can’t focus on the sermon because I’m trying not to laugh at what Peter was saying.

“You’re being rude Peter,” Amanda said. “The pastor is older than you, give him some respect.”

“No, the pastor is not just old, he’s ancient! I bet he won’t need phone or internet to contact his old friends, all he needs is an Ouija board. And the only respect his gonna get from me is respect from the dead!”

I giggled. “Sorry,” I said when Amanda glared at me. She hit my ribs with her elbows. “Aw! What was that for?”

“That’s for being rude to someone who’s older than you,” she said.

“Well sorry, I can’t help it. What Peter said was funny!” with that Peter held his hand in front of us and he mouthed “Give me five.”

Amanda crossed her arms and didn’t say a word. “Every kid here hates him anyway,” I said. “He’s an arrogant, self-centred, selfish man. We loathe him you know, me and everyone who’s my age.”

After the mass, Peter told Amanda that he needs to go to his classmate’s house to do some group project. Amanda and I went to eat on a fast food where we ask Jeremy to meet us.

“You still haven’t broken up with Peter,” I said. “I thought your eyes will open wide after all those times that he made you cry.”

“Ben, please,” she sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it. Besides we’re okay now.”

I sighed and sip on my coffee. I didn’t say anything so Amanda said “Blab it out, I know you want to say something but you’re just being a gentleman by not telling.”

“Okay. I’ll be frank with you. You said you’re okay now, but until when? You’ve said that hundreds of times before Amanda! And after few days you come to us crying,” I said. She didn’t answer. “I wished you didn’t ask me to say it.”

“Yeah, me too.”

Jeremy went strutting towards us. “Hey, guys! What did I miss?” He asked and sat beside Amanda. I looked at Amanda and she looked at me too and we said simultaneously, “Nothing.”

“I called you last night Ben but you didn’t answer,” he said.

“Oh, about that,” I said and thought of an excuse. “Well, I was asleep and I didn’t hear it. Sorry, buddy.”

“It’s alright bro,”

As always, it was Jer who did most of the talking. I listened this time, he’s trying to impress Amanda with his “extraordinary” skills on surfing, him being the captain of the basketball team of his old school, his experience in fishing, and more bragging. I know he didn’t make these things up, I saw pictures of him doing those things on their house when he asked me to come over.

Amanda, on the other hand, was amused. She’s totally listening to Jeremy. I think Jeremy’s plans are doing their job. I admit I hate this feeling, I feel so out of place and now... now I wish Jeremy didn’t come here at all!

*     *     *

I went outside the bathroom after a late night shower and lay on my bed after I put on my clothes on. It’s been a long week and thank God it’s Sunday tomorrow and I don’t have homework or things to do. I closed my eyes and was ready to sleep when my phone rang. What the hell? I look at the digital clock beside my bed, it says it’s already 12:45 a.m. Who would call me at this time of the night? If it’s Jeremy again I tell you I will have my phone thrown directly to his window and I’ll make sure I’ll hit him hard on the head!

I looked at it and to my surprise; it wasn’t JEREMY CENTINO that appeared on my phone’s screen. Instead it’s AMANDA PIERCE. Shoot! I switch on my lampshade and answered the call immediately. “Hello! Amanda! Hey,”

“Whoa! Whoa! Hold your horses,” she laughed. “Did I wake you up? Sorry.”

“No, its okay,” I said. I can’t help it but to smile as I try not to shout in because Amanda called. “What is it?”

“Nothing, it’s just that I can’t sleep,” can you believe this? I can’t describe the feeling when she said that, she chose to call me instead of Peter now that she can’t sleep!

We talk for hours, I know that she forgot that it was Monday tomorrow but I didn’t remind her because I don’t want this conversation to end, we could be like this forever. I can feel that she’s still wide awake, there’s no hint of drowsiness in her sweet voice. Jeremy was very open to me about his feelings for Amanda, I don’t think I could do the same to him, I can’t tell him that I have feelings for the same girl that she likes.

 *     *     *

 I went outside the bathroom after a late night shower and lay on my bed after I put on my clothes on. It’s been a long week and thank God it’s Sunday tomorrow and I don’t have homework or things to do. I closed my eyes and was ready to sleep when my phone rang. What the hell? I look at the digital clock beside my bed, it says it’s already 12:45 a.m. Who would call me at this time of the night?

“Hiya, Ben!” it was Jeremy.

“Hullo, Jer,” I greeted. “So what’s up?” Why do people always call me at 12:45? Are these vampires or what?

There it goes; I wish I never answered his phone call. I put my phone under my bed and put my earphones on and played music as loud as possible, I will just tell Jeremy that I fell asleep.

*     *     *

I went outside the bathroom after a late night shower and lay on my bed after I put on my clothes on. It’s been a long week and thank God it’s Sunday tomorrow and I don’t have homework or things to do. I closed my eyes and was ready to sleep when my phone rang. What the hell? I look at the digital clock beside my bed, it says it’s already 7:25 p.m. I’m sure it is Jeremy or Amanda. Please be Amanda! It’s a miracle though that they called earlier than usual.

“Ben?” yes! It was Amanda. But there’s something wrong with her voice. Is she crying?

“Amanda!” I said. “What’s the problem? Are you crying?”

“Ben, I don’t know what to do,” she said and sobbed some more. I waited for her to stop and she said, “Peter broke up with me.”

“Hey, what?” I was shocked. After all that has happened between them (mainly Peter’s fault) now Peter just broke up with her? Isn’t that supposed to be that Amanda has the right to break up with him?

“I saw him a while ago with another girl,” she took a deep breath to stop herself from crying, “kissing.”

“Wha—! Bullshit, I mean, that jerk! How dare him to cheat on you!”

“And I talked to him over the phone and he told me that I got no right to accuse him for things that he didn’t do. I told him I saw it myself, and he said that our relationship won’t go anywhere else so it’s best if we just end it now,” she said calmly.

“Well I think it’s for the best, too,” I said. “You don’t deserve to have a guy like him in your life, a man whose brain was full of shit and jerk enough to be a terrorist’s son (I heard her chuckle) and clearly he doesn’t deserve to have a passionate, caring, lovely, and beautiful girl like you.”

“Ben, can I ask you to come over here? I’m alone and I don’t want to be alone tonight. Please?” she pleaded.

“Of course, I’ll be there in thirty minutes. I’ll just go and change my clothes!” I said enthusiastically.

I put down my phone and change clothes. I wore my white PE shirt and put my red sweater on and a pair of khaki shorts. I took my phone and ran outside my room. Mum and Dad’s on my grandmum’s place and they’re going to sleep there so I just knock on my sister’s bedroom and told her I’m going to Amanda’s place.

As expected, I pedalled my way to Amanda’s house of course considering the fact that I don’t have a car. I went to the police station, taking the shortcut, and I turned left to the post office where I took the straight path towards Mrs. Seeley’s, a family friend, and turned left again and found the Pierce’s house.

Amanda was waiting for me outside. “You said you’ll be here in 30 minutes.”

“Sorry I’m late,” I said.

“No you’re not late, in fact your five minutes early.”

The Pierce’s house was just as big as ours. I sat on the couch beside Amanda where bottles of soda and bags of chips are laid in front of me. “I hope you don’t mind watching Drew Barrymore movies,” Amanda said as she took the remote control and pressed the play button.

“No, I don’t mind,” I don’t mind to watch these kinds of movies as long as I’m watching it with you.

Neither of us mentioned the name Peter or talk about the topic that is related to him. We just enjoyed ourselves with the movie, chips, soda, and each other’s company (especially me!). Man, Jeremy will be jealous if he ever finds out about this!

When we reached the last thirty minutes of the movie, Amanda’s head fell on my shoulders. I look at her, she didn’t fell asleep. I just let her lay on my shoulders; we can be like this forever.  She held my hand and said, 

“Do you want to watch another Drew Barrymore movie?”

“No,”

We’re like that for the rest of the second movie. I put my head above hers, smelling her fragrant hair and wished that she was mine. I put my arm around her shoulders and we both sighed. I know that even if her eyes are watching, she’s thinking about what happened bet her and Peter. “I forgot, you know,” she said.

“Forgot what?” I was puzzled.

“Forgot what it feels like to have a family, to have people who ask you of your okay, to have someone there to have Holidays with you, someone to spend the day with,” she said. When I didn’t answer she added, “I lost my parents, you see, when I was eleven when our old house was burned. It was arson. The culprit was never caught. My Dad’s brother took me here and he became my father since then. He was like a real father to me and he even told me that I can call him Dad.”

“Are you still sad about you’re lost?” I asked. I realized it was a stupid question. “I guess you’re still grieving.”

“Sad, yes, but grieving, not anymore. People die every day, people will move on and world will revolve even without me, and it’s up to me if I will go with it or be stuck where I am. I don’t want to be left alone by the world so I have to move on; I have to move on for those people who will never come back to me.”
We drank soda and ate chips as we watch the movie. I didn’t let go of Amanda until she needs to go to the bathroom to wash her hands, I didn’t put my arms around her shoulders and she didn’t put her head back on mine, it would feel awkward if we did.

After 4 hours, two Drew Barrymore movies, two bags of chips, and two bottles of soda, we decided to sleep. I help her clean the things we used before I left. She accompanied me up to their drive way, and to my biggest surprise, she gave me a kiss on the cheek! I blushed of course, but she didn’t notice it because there’s not enough light outside to show how red my face is. “Thanks,” she said.

“No problem,” I said. “You’re welcome.”

I know now for sure that I’m in love with her, and I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends. I love her but I’m just too shy and I don’t know why!

I went home and went straight to bed. It was 1:00 a.m., I know I should be happy, I spent time with Amanda, she gave me a kiss on the cheek, I had the best night ever, but I am not! Why? Maybe it’s because I grew some care for Jeremy, and he’s my best friend, that I don’t want to be his rival. I feel like I’m betraying him by falling in love with Amanda.

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